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// Tech news at terminal velocity
cat 2026-03-24.md
$ cat TLDR.md
▸ • The FCC drops a bombshell, banning the sale of all new consumer Wi-Fi routers manufactured outside the US over national security concerns.
▸ • Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang claps back at gamers calling DLSS 5 "AI slop," arguing the tech is strictly guided by human artists.
▸ • Cloudflare unveils its Gen 13 servers, ditching massive caches for 192-core AMD Turin chips to double their edge compute performance.
In a shocking move, the FCC has banned the sale of any new consumer Wi-Fi routers made outside the US, citing national security risks. This means heavyweights like TP-Link and Asus are out in the cold unless they secure a rare Pentagon exemption, leaving US consumers with a drastically shrinking pool of options.
Nintendo is reportedly slashing its initial production run for the highly anticipated Switch 2 from 6 million down to 4 million units this quarter. The culprit? Weakening demand for consoles in the US market has the gaming giant playing it safe.
Ultrahuman is aggressively pushing into the US market with its new Ring Pro, aiming directly at Oura's 60% market share dominance. Because apparently, we all need more metrics telling us how poorly we slept last night.
Oracle is expanding its AI Agent Studio with a new "Agentic Applications Builder" for Fusion Applications. It's designed to help enterprises move beyond simple chatbots and build autonomous workflows that actually get work done.
After gamers revolted against Nvidia's new neural rendering tech, CEO Jensen Huang took to the Lex Fridman podcast to clear the air. He insists DLSS 5 isn't just generating hallucinatory filler, but rather strictly adhering to the "ground truth" geometry and textures created by human artists. Whether gamers buy that explanation remains to be seen.
A leaked look at AMD's 2026/2027 enterprise roadmap shows the chipmaker isn't slowing down. The upcoming Zen 6-based EPYC "Venice" processors will pack up to 256 cores on TSMC's 2nm process, promising a 70% performance bump over the current Turin lineup.
Cloudflare's new Gen 13 servers are a masterclass in hardware-software co-design. By rewriting their core request handling layer in Rust (FL2), they eliminated their dependency on massive L3 caches, allowing them to deploy 192-core AMD EPYC Turin chips and double their edge compute throughput.
GitHub is expanding its application security coverage by integrating AI-powered detections directly into its Code Security suite. The system uses CodeQL alongside LLMs to identify vulnerabilities across a wider range of languages and frameworks before they hit production.
A developer created a custom Linux distribution designed to be installed by piping `wget` directly into `dd`. It's a terrifyingly elegant hack that bypasses traditional installers entirely, proving once again that just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should.
To celebrate its 30th anniversary, Opera released a tool that lets you rewind the web and experience sites exactly as they looked in 1996. Prepare your eyes for an onslaught of marquee tags, hit counters, and aggressively tiled background images.
Emil Michael, former Uber executive and current senior Pentagon official, publicly stated he will "never forgive" the investors who ousted him and Travis Kalanick. It's a spicy reminder that Silicon Valley memories are long, and the drama never really dies.